Introducing...

Nicolas Lorenzo Ortiz!!

Nicolas was born on March 20, 2006 in Guatemala. He weighed 6 lbs 13 oz and 47 cms long.

Here is his picture then:



SO cute!!

At his 1 month check-up he weighed in at 8lbs 13 oz, length of 51.4 cms.

Here is his one month photo:



Look at all of that hair!!

At his 2 month check-up he weighed in at 11 lbs 12 oz, length of 55.2 cms.

Here is his picture:



A little peek of his eyes, he is a sleepy head! Speaking of heads they cut his beautiful hair!! :-(

He is in private foster care where I have been told he has a great foster mommy who dotes on his every move. He is currently 3 months old. I should be getting another medical update. I will also be getting in the mail a DVD and picture of him. The adoption agency went to Guatemala to visit all of the babies and did this for the families. I was able to send him a little care package. I sent him a toy, an outfit, a photo album with pictures of us in it, a note for him and for his foster mom. I am SO excited to see the DVD. I hope he will be awake and I can see his amazing eyes!

A Little Update with Big News

Ok, so I am seriously bad about this blogging thing. As much time that I spend on my computer you would think that I would squeeze a little of blogging in. I guess I am busy reading other blogs!

On to the update...

Elizabeth is now 17 months old and growing like a weed. She is still small in weight but is growing taller everyday. We think she will be tall and skinny, her Dad is already dreaming of her shooting hoops. She is now getting feeding therapy and we are working toward getting her to eat more and trying different things. One of my main fustrations is that I can not get her to drink from a sippy cup. I have purchased about 15 different kinds of cups to see if one will work. No luck. The only liquid she takes in is from 2 bottles a day, so discouraging!!

She is still enjoying her playgroup and loves to run around with the kids. I have also let her go spend a WHOLE week with her Nana 5 hours away. It was really hard the first time. I know she will be very well taken care of and extremely spoiled but I do miss her when she is gone. She has had 2 week long visits. It gives me a bit of a break and allows all of the family more time to spend with her than what we usually have on just a weekend visit.

Beth's surgery for her owie is still not scheduled. Truth be told I am scared to death therefore I have not called the surgeon and set up a date. Pray that I will have enough peace to do this and hand her over to the surgeon when the time comes.

On to the BIG news...

No, I am not pregnant (at least that I know of). We are ADOPTING!! We are adopting a little boy named Nicolas Lorenzo Ortiz. He was born/is in Guatemala. Nicolas has the "ear issue" just like Beth. He is currently 3 months old as of yesterday. This was a very unexpected event in our life but some of the best things are unplanned. We can truley say that God has lead us into this. We are very excited and nervous at the same time. We pray that we have him home by the end of this year. Adoption is very expensive and as it was unplanned we do not have all of the funds saved up for it. We have stepped out on faith that the funds will be provided as they are due. So far so good!! Keep us in your prayers about this.

My house is still a disaster and it is eating at me everyday. I just do not know what to do with it. My mom says I have too much "junk". When I look at the house as a whole I agree but when I start looking at the "junk" it is not junk anymore, most of it has a value to me. Maybe I should just let go?? I need purging...or a bigger house!!

I really want to get better at blogging but I can't make any promises. Does it matter anyways, no one reads this stuff!!!

Logo for Inspired By Beth

I've been working on a graphic to put on a banner for my buisness. I am not sure about it yet though. I am trying to get it put together for when I go to trades daysand craft fairs. I have an idea of what I want and have it made up but not sure about the wording on it. I am making jewelry...bracelets, necklaces, earrings. I also haveembellished hats, shirts and such. I plan on making some little clothing items for girls like dresses and such as well as bows and anything else that I come up with along the way. I am wanting to put what I have on the banner but not sure how to word it. I know it will say jewelry, but how do you word everything that I listed without having like 20 items on it? *laughs* Would Jewelry & Boutique Items work? Any suggestions?

Here is the banner:


Any suggestions on it like decoration wise is welcomed too!

A Visit From The Aunt

Grrr! I don't know why she treats me this way. She knows I am glad and get hopeful when her visit is delayed in the slightest. Then she pops in suddenly and ruins a perfectly good day. She is the house guest I cannot stand. Oh well, I guess I will start my charting adventures in the morning. I will officially become a chart stalker once again.

POAS Syndrome

I've got it. I did it. I Pee'd On A Stick. The stick was broken, it had to be. Maybe it was because it was an off-brand stick? Back to reality. The stick wasn't broken or bad because it was an off-brand. It just did not reveal the sign I wanted it to. I don't know why I did it. I could not resist any longer. I should be getting a visit from Aunt Flo in about 2-3 days. My little chart says it should start the 5th. I want to see a different sign. The + sign that brought a rush of joy over my body in May of '04. I remember that morning, I dreaded POAS. I had POAS so many times before and got the - sign every time. Why would that morning be any different? It was because God had blessed me with my amazing little girl.

POAS at 4 a.m.
Lay it carefully as the instructions say
Try not to peek before the time instructed
Peek anyway
Big smile
Never smile this big this early
Tell the dog as he is the only one up, he will keep the secret
Get back in bed
Send up a praise and a prayer
Gently kiss the Father
Send him off to work
Buy early Father's Day card
Wait for his return, the wait is long
Go out to eat
Waiter brings gift bag
Unknowing Father confused, "This is not mine"
Waiter insists, "You are the 50th customer in our promotional give away"
He reaches in, pulls out a card that reads Thomas
He questions, "How do they know my name?"
New Mother coaches him to open it
Finally he knows, "Really?" he exclaims
Tears flow
Joy
And two became three

Grab Bag

This is just going to be a mess of rambling, a grab bag of sorts, you don't know what you will get.


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Broken:

I am up late again, 1 a.m., for the 5th day in a row. What is wrong with me? I am not tired right now all that much although I do know I should be in bed. I know in the morning I will be exhausted not wanting to budge from my new perfect Tempur Pedic bed. Ah, yes...I finally am sleeping in a real bed! If only Itty Bitty would stop crying from her Pack N Play I could sleep the day away but she will not allow this to happen. Why does she not understand that Mommy IS tired? One day she will understand. I go to bed late and sleep late and that is why my house is a mess. I also have absolutely no motivation to speak of.

A friend of mine thinks I am depressed. She may be right, probably is. Even my own mother mentions that she thinks I am in a state of depression. What does she know, she is 5 hours from me. I joke and say "Yeah, I am crazy and depressed." and laugh it off. I refuse to admit to her that she may possibly be right. Why have I not gone to the doctor? I don't want to admit that I am "broken". Will my husband understand? I don't know. I've tried to have a conversation beating around the bush about it, never coming out and saying the word depressed. He says I just need to relax and not let things bother me so much. Easier said than done.

My "symptoms":

1. Tired, constantly. Could go to bed early and still want to sleep the day away.
2. Irritable, even when it is not PMS time.
3. Change in weight. I've always been "big boned" but since I've gotten married I've gained a
LOT of weight.
4. Back pain. I have 2 herniated discs in my lower back so this may be from this.
5. Difficulty concentrating and remember anything. I feel like I am 80 years old and
cannot remember anything to save my life.
6. Feeling guilty, hopeless or worthless. I apologize for the stupidest things that I know are not
my fault. Worthless part...I don't feel like I am "worth" anything in the outside world. I know
I am worth something to Elizabeth but that is about it.

Comments welcome.

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Inspired By Beth:

As mentioned before I've ventured into the craft of making jewelry. I have made bracelets for two different support groups that I am involved in with Itty Bitty. I've sold a heap of them. I really enjoy making them too. Silly thing, I don't have one yet of my own. I am also planning on making one for a support group that my friend moderates so she can offer them to her group. I need to get started on those.

I plan on setting up a booth at an upcoming festival here in my little town. It is the "Catfish Festival"...pretty hick, huh? I need to get very busy with this little venture. It is March 31 through April 2nd. The cost of the booth is low, $35, not bad at all. I just have to spend a little, okay a lot, of money to stock up on my supplies to make stuff to put in the booth. This also means I have to spend a lot of time making items, time that I can't seem to find. Itty Bitty allows no time for creativity as she is into everything and her new favorite past time, trying to eat dog food. Lovely. I have some good ideas and need to get them rolling. The weekend after the festival is a pretty big trades day that I am going to try to get a space in. Am I crazy or what??

When I get some of the things made up I am going to try to get pictures of them up on the internet.

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Baby Fever:

I have a high fever, Baby Fever. Yes, I am definitely crazy! Admit me now! My cuddly baby is gone. She has morphed into a tempur tantrum, dog food eating, little person. I went through her drawers and closet last week to weed out the clothes she can no longer wear. Little T-Shirts I will always love because they were the first things she could wear while she was in the NICU with all the wires and tubes entangling her little body. The dress she came home in, the dress she wore for her first professional photos and the one she wore the day we had her dedicated to the God that blessed us with her. What do I do with these things? Can I keep them all or do I need to let them go? I don't know if I can.

I see new baby's and my fever rises. I hear their cries and I melt. I want to feel those fluttery movements in my womb again. I want Elizabeth to have a brother/sister close in age. If I could choose of course most of all would be a healthy baby then I would pick a little boy. I would have my girl, then my boy and then I would be able to adopt my little girl from China. God has really put it on my heart to adopt from China. I don't know why but He has.

Charts, thermometer, and OPK's. These are what my world revolved around a few months before I got preggers with Itty Bitty. It took us a year and a half to conceive. I wanted it so bad to see those 2 lines. I bought the books, checked cervical mucus, position and softness, took temps and recorded them all. I think all of this stressed us both out even more. I threatened my DH with a turkey baster, ask only if you are sure you want to know. I don't want to have to go through this again but I think I will have to for awhile. I have low progesterone levels and feel that I have been pregnant before but due to my low levels my body does not realize it and sheds the lining. I need to have documentation of my cycles for my doctor to look at so he does not think that I am just impatient. Okay, I am impatient but still. So, after I start my next cycle which should be around the middle of the first week of March I shall resurrect my purple basal body thermometer. Happy charting to me!

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Tired:

Okay, I am tired now. I hear Itty Bitty crying in the bedroom. She is snuggled down, or was, with her Daddy. They are SO cute when they are sleeping. Last night, well 2 a.m. this morning, she was playing peek-a-boo from under the sheets and giggling because she knew she should be sleeping. She was so cute and I will remember that moment forever. Just me and her, giggling in the dark.

Still Here

I am still here, floating around somewhere. I am going insane with this house. It has got to get finished. I am so tired of sleeping on an air mattress. There are so many things I need to get done. I need to get on some sort of schedule. I want to start a workout plan. Thinking about going to Curves. I had a "friend" that said she wanted to do it with me but is now backing out. So...it will be just me and my fat all alone jiggling on the machines. I know I need to do this. I need to get active and healthy. I want to get pregnant again and I had such a hard time last time. Maybe it was due to weight or maybe not. But I DO know that I have a mutated gene that makes it easy for my blood to clot, which is never a good thing. I figure it would be easier to start being active now and then get preggers then to do it in reverse order. I went to good ole Wal-Mart last night and put a few workout outfits on layaway. It's a start isn't it? At least I will have a good wardrobe!!

I need to get my camera cleaned out since it is totally full. I am so scared to delete them though, afraid I will put them on the computer and it will crash and all my memories captured will be lost forever. Elizabeth had her 1st Birthday and I have all of the pictures from it to show. She was such a cutie pie!! Got a little fussy at the end but she did really well. She had her own little cake and mushed it all over and took her very slow sweet time opening gifts.

I am awful with this blogging thing, I really want to get better at it. I should just set aside a time and do it. Thing is all my time seems to fly by and nothing gets done.

I found this new thing called FLYing and I am thinking about trying it out... http://www.flylady.net/index.asp Who knows, it might work. So I want to start Curving and Flying!!

Which one? 

Does this picture look fake?